So, two things have shifted in our household over the past month or so. The first is relatively significant. Everyone should brace themselves but…I have begun cooking. As in, meals. Sometimes meals that contain meat. Gabe has always been the commander in chief of the kitchen, for a variety of reasons, some noble (he’s a man who cooks for his family) others less noble (he’s picky.)
Over this summer and increasingly so as school has been in session, its become clear that due to work demands Gabe does not have the time to cook dinner, and M-F its anyone’s guess whether he will be home at a reasonable hour. In the past, this didn’t matter as much, but with school and strict bedtimes and the fact that the kids are starving as early as 5pm has made waiting for Dad less desirable. Much of the summer our dinners were “mom meals” aka microwavable or pasta. Or take out. Realizing that this whole Lindsay Being In Charge of Dinner thing was becoming a trend, I decided to start trying to cook. Which means I get to make a meal plan! And do the grocery shopping!! its pretty exciting ;)
Ok, so. The other shift. Awhile ago one of the kids left some bakery muffins open on the counter…and Moose ate them. He’s never been a counter-surfer or trash hunter but of course he is an animal, a lab at that, and the muffins were lovely and aromatic. I didn’t think that much of it. Couple days later….freshly baked loaf of banana bread disapeared…all that was left was the foil. Then some cornbread. Then something that I can’t remember but I do remember angrily texting someone “That was my LUNCH! He ate my freaking lunch!” We started putting him in confinement when not home and I made a point to tell everyone to be more conscious about leaving food out (you can imagine how that went over with an 8 and a 4 year old…) But. Moose is nearly 4 and he’s never done this, so we aren’t in the habit. Then there was a loaf of bread that disapeared. The banana that was stolen from the fruit bowl and scarfed right in front of me.
So. The month of September has been busy. I can’t remember every single item of food. Last week, in my now deluxe planning mode, I made a roast chicken. A whole chicken, with a homemade rub, stuffed with lemons and stuff, in the crock pot for 8 hours. Came home and put it under the broiler for 5 minutes. Transferred to a platter where it basically fell off the bones…which I picked out and then arranged it all with the vegetables. Covered it all with tinfoil and ran upstairs to give Stella a fast shower before the Gabes got home. The house smelled heavenly. The chicken was beautiful. My only regret was not taking a picture of it. Because when I came downstairs no more then 10 minutes later, this is what I saw:
Gone. The whole thing. AN ENTIRE 6# CHICKEN! He was nice enough to leave some scraps and vegetables but the entire chicken was gone, foil strewn about, the cooktop smeared with slobber and pawprints. I screamed out “OH MY GOD!!” (Just kidding, I screamed out a bunch of expletives and Stella started to cry.)
I’ve heard stories like this. Of labs stealing food. Of counter surfers. Of dogs taking the Christmas Eve ham. But seriously. Moose has always been a dog of extremes…I am fond of saying that everything about him, good or bad, is 150%. And he gets a freaking A+ in food stealing.
The good news is its kind of a funny story. And he had zero fall out from his thievery in the digestive area. And we happened to have a frozen pizza and it wasn’t the end of the world. And Stella learned some new words. (Just kidding again! She’s heard them all before!)
And…he’s a big lug of a dog who doesn’t even fit on the chair. And if nothing else, I think we’ve all learned our lesson about leaving food out. Everything is safely stored in the fridge, the microwave, and the oven. Fingers crossed that he doesn’t figure out how to open these!!